People often go about their lives in a frenzy of problem solving. They move from one fire to another, putting it out to their satisfaction before racing off to the next one. But to what end? Why solve the individual issues when the real factor is the over-riding attitude towards the situation. Let me give an example.
Say there is a couple. They are having problem after problem. One (or maybe even both) of them is working very hard to solve each problem or maybe they are just stacking up the problems as evidence to how badly their partner is treating them. When the real problem is their attitude towards each other. When last did they wake up and think “I want to make my partner’s life better today. I want to treat them with kindness and see them smile. I want to work as a team.”
And this applies to any interaction. I don’t think of myself as a mean or selfish person but ever since I started my day giving a few minutes to think how I can improve someone else’s life or about what attitude I want to tackle the day with, it has made an enormous difference to my relationships, my interactions with random people and in the end, to my overall well-being.
Often it feels as if we are just scurrying around trying to grab whatever instantaneous joy we can for ourselves. Whether it’s in the ADD way we check our social media and mail to see who superficially loves us enough to “like” us or in the next drink/chocolate/random thrill. If we stepped back and thought more about our over-riding attitude, we would need these quick fixes less, the insanity and noise would die down and we would find some peace.
It’s the difference between controlling your temper so that you don’t snap at someone and changing your view of the world so that you don’t even feel like snapping at them. You just want to know how to help them.